"Sorry, I can't. I have ballet."

One grey legwarmer, a long-flowy skirt and over-sized puffer jacket. My rehearsal outfit of choice. Yes, the weather is turning as winter approaches in Cape Town. But there is more to that influencing my OOTD.

The mirror. Our trusty friend when we want to check our alignment, fix our hair, or pick up class exercises. Our worst enemy when we feel insecure and have a bad day.

As I’ve been reflecting on the conversations with Jess and Jordan, it stood out to me how similar we all are as dancers.

As dancers, we are inclined to want to:

1. Be in control &

2. Be prepared

You might be thinking, “Of course, Mia! That’s literally what we are trained for.”

The problem is that life doesn’t always go as planned. Having control and feeling prepared isn’t always possible. 

And that’s okay!

So how do we cope when life takes an unexpected turn? Or when we no longer like the direction we’re going in?

I have two suggestions that have helped me.

👉️ The first is to take some time away from the “problem”. 

The best way to do that is to invest time doing other things you love. Go see a movie. Have a friend’s dinner date. Visit a family member.

From a young age, we’ve been conditioned to say “no” to other activities we enjoy. No to sports, birthdays, sleepovers, and more.

Teachers might’ve said you were not committed enough. Or said you were undisciplined when you asked permission to miss class or rehearsal.

I’ve just turned 28. The thing I wish I did more of… is say “YES”! 🥳 

Yes to more birthdays and sleepovers. 

Yes to find out what I enjoy outside of the studio. 

Yes to spending time with non-ballet friends. 

Yes to learning how to express myself (that’s not through dance).

Yes to finding a hobby.

Yes to balance.

The dancers I’ve seen have a happy and healthy career, are the ones that cultivated a life outside of the studio.

I think that also makes the transition away from ballet easier.

👉️ The second suggestion is to surrender our desired plans and timeline…

The right thing in the wrong season becomes a ‘wrong’ thing.

As we’re heading into the second half of 2024 - crazy right?! - I’m sure you have some unfulfilled hopes. Maybe some dreams for the year that either haven’t happened or have been delayed. 

That’s life for you, hey!

Goals and plans are important in our journey. Sometimes though, they can cause us to strive and fight for something that might not be meant for us.

It’s amazing how surrendering can sometimes cause that door to open - or another unexpected one.

Causing us to go where we were ACTUALLY meant to go.

Is there an area in your life or career that you feel stuck in?

Or do you need to change course?

Or have things turned out differently than you planned?

Try taking some time to gain perspective and surrender what was or isn't yet. 

It is quite freeing when we let go of our need for control and perfection.